Why does it hurt my wife when we make love

Why does it hurt my wife when we make love

In a mutually consensual intimate relationship, it’s vital that both individuals feel at ease. Therefore, recognizing any potential reasons for your wife’s discomfort or pain during intimacy is crucial. Many women occasionally experience discomfort or pain during such encounters, and there can be various reasons for this.

Why does my wife experience pain during intimacy?

Let’s explore the typical causes of pain or discomfort during intimacy and various methods to mitigate it moving forward.


A prevalent cause many women experience is elevated stress levels, which can affect the body’s ability to relax the muscles in the lower region. This muscle tension can result in discomfort for women during intimacy.

Muscle Contractions or Infections

Muscle contractions can frequently lead to significant discomfort or pain during intimacy. Additionally, unnoticed infections in the area can be quite painful. Fortunately, when an infection is present, other symptoms can validate it, making it advisable to seek medical consultation.

Emotional Fluctuations

It’s not essential to always feel amorous, and this is true for both men and women. In cases where women attempt to engage intimately solely for their partner’s satisfaction, they may inadvertently inflict harm on their bodies, leading to pain and unease.

Incorrect Postures

Another possible cause for your wife’s discomfort during intimacy might be the chosen position. Not every position is comfortable for everyone, and venturing beyond what’s familiar can be a primary reason for the pain or discomfort she experiences.

How Can I Ensure Intimacy With My Wife Is Pain-Free?

Many relationships face challenges when they encounter difficulties with penetrative intimacy. Such challenges often arise from the belief that penetration represents the pinnacle of closeness or the sole manifestation of love. Although this perspective is common, it lacks creativity and can limit couples who adhere to it.

Struggling with penetration can affect your partner’s self-worth, making them feel culpable for an issue beyond their grasp. If this situation isn’t approached with empathy, they might shy away from physical touch. There might be apprehension about triggering arousal and subsequently having to restrain from fulfilling those urges.

Prioritize understanding and warmth. Reinforce that your love isn’t solely based on physical intimacy. Express your care by inquiring about their feelings and supporting them through any treatment. Display your fondness without necessarily making it about sex. Simple gestures like holding hands, gentle kisses, or embracing during a film can make them feel treasured.

Rethink your intimate experiences. Even if penetrative acts are uncomfortable for your wife, it doesn’t mean you can’t find joy in each other’s company. There are numerous ways to experience closeness and achieve satisfaction without causing discomfort.

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